Crossfit Relationship “Phases” (or the diary of a crossfit romance) » My journey to the Crossfit Open 2014 » Covered in Chalk

relationship diceNow as you know, Crossfit and I have been together for a while now (14 months to be exact). As such, we’ve been through all the phases you would expect of a new relationship.  (This article describes the 9 stages of a love relationship.)

We went through the original “infatuation” phase where you can’t stop talking about your new relationship. No, I’m serious; I didn’t talk about anything but Crossfit for at least 6 months.

Then the phase when you start to realize that neither one of you is perfect – don’t get me wrong, you are both still awesome – but one of you has brought Thrusters into your relationship and any way you look at them, there is nothing good about a Thruster (fyi: this can be referred to as “the stage of disturbances”).

After that, we went through the “Molding Stage” (the stage where you try to mold your partner into the perfect partner).  At least I went through this, I’m not sure Crossfit actively tried to mold me…it just seemed that way (it was certainly trying to mold my *ss through some kind of fanatical fixation with repeated squatting! Heh heh).  I think this occurred around month 9 or 10 – I wanted Crossfit to be all about lifts that I liked (and which came easily to me, i.e. the press) and to not mention the lifts that I couldn’t stand, (i.e. the Front Squat and any kind of lunge).  I also wanted to only have to put in an amount of effort that I was comfortable with. I was afraid to push through my comfort zone and so I hung around repeatedly doing things I was comfortable doing and ignoring the things I wasn’t. Fortunately for me, my box has coaches and friends who don’t let you coast through, who pushed me to lift heavier, to suck it up and learn to get my arms up high enough in the front rack position (so, so hard!).

But pushing myself harder led Crossfit and me into the “Happy Stage”. I experimented with new lifts (the Snatch), worked on my pull-ups, started to focus on my areas of weakness (mobility) and I even started the Hatch Program  to force myself to get better at front squats. It was a lot of work but it was a happy time.

…and then at month 12, holidays kicked in.  I love holidays. I loved the holidays that I’ve been on over the last two months.  They’ve been great. But they haven’t been great for my relationship with Crossfit. I have definitely neglected Crossfit. Sure I threw it a scrap of my attention now and then through visits to some cool boxes (Las Vegas, Prague), but it certainly wasn’t enough to maintain a healthy relationship (let alone to sustain the gains I had made over a year).

Enter “The Stage of Doubts”. Whenever you don’t nurture something, or give it its proper value, doubts can creep in.  Now that I’m back at the box (in Month 14 after 6 weeks of holiday), my confidence in my relationship with Crossfit is low.  I’m tentative in my lifts and I feel like I am never going to get to where I want to be in time for the Crossfit Open.  The week that I’ve been back at the box regularly, has been a hard one. I’ve had a day where I wanted to quit Crossfit altogether (stupid kettlebell swings), followed by a day where I fell back in love with Crossfit (Snatch).  It’s like being on an emotional rollercoaster – the same feeling that you get when your real-life relationship isn’t going well and you aren’t really sure if you two are going to make it.lovecoaster

But I guess this is “The Bust Stage”, I can either give up and become disinterested or I can think of new ways to strengthen my relationship with Crossfit. To help it keep evolving.  Since my giving up Crossfit is just never going to happen (I really can’t imagine life without it anymore), I’m just going to have to, once again, suck it up and put in the time and effort needed to make this relationship great again.

Either way, I’ll be in the box on Monday….after this one last holiday weekend….

One Response to “ Crossfit Relationship “Phases” (or the diary of a crossfit romance) ”

  1. jennifer says:

    Haha.. love this.

    I’ve been meaning to write a similar post myself! It’s fun as you see new people join the box and see them go through phases as well!

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