I didn’t pack guilt in my suitcase…so why is it here? (feeling guilty while on holiday)

This isn’t your average “I feel so guilty because I haven’t worked out while on holiday” post – I have worked out – twice. Both times were awesome. I will probably do it again. Nope, this post isn’t about that. This post is about feeling guilty for not having as much “fun” as I am programmed to think I should.

Let me explain – somewhere along the way, maybe from all the advertisements, or other people’s stories about everything they did while on holiday, I got the idea that holidays need to be one action-packed, once-in-a-lifetime moment after the other.  That I should be staying up all night drinking champagne, visiting museums and famous places during the day and generally bringing home the kinds of stories that make your friends jealous.  And to be fair, I do have an awful lot of once-in-a-lifetime moments when I go on holiday. This isn’t what makes me feel guilty though….

I am about to make another confession (and no, I still don’t pee the bed). At least once every holiday that I have been on for as far back as I can remember, I lock myself in the hotel room/tent/hostel/apartment etc… and spend a morning lying in bed reading trashy romance novels.  (Quality literature, completely underrated as a genre). And I feel guilty the entire time. I feel like I should be out there, embracing every moment, every opportunity. It doesn’t matter that lying in bed, reading paranormal fiction is exactly what I feel like doing at that moment, there is always that little voice in my head that says I should be doing more, that I should be a better holidayer (probably not a real word).  So I close the curtains, order room service and hide in my room. And it feels like hiding because I feel guilty. It doesn’t feel like I’m relaxing and just chilling out.  And that’s my own damn fault. Because, at some point in time, I drank the holiday Kool-Aid. Which is totally different from the Crossfit Kool-Aid in that Holiday Kool-Aid sucks. Crossfit Kool-Aid makes your life better and brings great people into your life. Holiday Kool-Aid makes you feel guilty for taking a few hours to just chill the f*ck out.

If there is one thing that Crossfit has taught me (it has taught me many things, but this is the one I am focusing on now) it’s to take ownership for the things you do to yourself. You want to eat a massive amount of carbs for whatever reason, do it, it’s your choice – but own it. You want to skip the met-con because it has running in it (always), do it, it’s your choice but own your decision. It’s like that with holiday guilt, I can either choose to keep feeling guilty and let the guilt own me, or I can chose, that once a vacation, I am going to lie in bed, read about shapeshifters because that is what I want to do and it is my d*mn holiday. I can chose to own it. And so I will.

There is, however, one down side to locking yourself in your hotel room….there are no Margueritas in your hotel room.  And what are Margueritas if not another type of kool-aid that I should consume? Time to put my book down, having enjoyed my time-out, and go hunt up my friends and a Marguerita or two…hey, it’s 5 o’clock somewhere….

One Response to “ I didn’t pack guilt in my suitcase…so why is it here? (feeling guilty while on holiday) ”

  1. jennifer says:

    I went on vacation late June and packed my KB, jumprope, AbMat, shoes, and workout clothes. I had full intentions of beach WODs and running alone the shore and discovering how many body-weight workouts I could fit in the week.

    I read 7 books.

    I napped. A lot.

    I ate Tim Horton’s pastries every morning so I could get my daily Wi-Fi fix since I had no internet access (and out of the country, so no cell access) at the cottage.

    And know what? I would not have changed it for a thing!! 🙂

    Do whatever the heck you want and have an awesome time doing it!!

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