What do men worry about at the gym?

99 and 86 problems

As you know, I’m a girl – well a woman actually (as a side note, when are you too old to refer to yourself as a girl?). And with being a woman, comes a lot of really inexplicable neuroses. Never has this been more apparent than my recent (I admit, sporadic) trips to the Crossfit box.

Because yes, I worry about not being able to do a pull-up and about my squat technique, but I also worry about some really random stuff. Which got me thinking. But before I wow you with my musings on this, let me give you some examples of these tiny moments of craziness:

  • The other day, while doing lunges, I realized that it had been a few days since I had last shaved my legs..and I was in 3/4 pants. For the rest of the class I was convinced that everyone was judging me for my furry legs.
  • When getting ready for the gym recently, I put on one of my favourite quirky crossfit shirts…and promptly took it off.  Why? Because you could see some chubbies in the side boob area. Not side boob, (which is apparently a thing), but chubbies. I couldn’t wear that!! Everyone would think that I’m a chubster! Anyone with eyes has already noticed the post-wedding weight gain…I don’t need to make it obvious to them!
  • Gah, sweat patches – oh my g*d, do I look like I’ve peed my pants? Does my sweat from my crazy hard (okay, 85% of max effort) metcon make me look like I widdled on myself?
  • What is that smell? It smells funny in here….sh*t, everyone is going to think it’s me! Is it me? Oh my g*d, it might be me. How can I discreetly go to the changeroom and check if I’m the smelly one.
  • Yup..I have definitely been wearing the same black workout pants for the last 3 days…everyone probably thinks I only own one pair of pants. They probably also think I don’t do laundry. I BATHE PEOPLE, I PROMISE!!!!

And the list goes on and on…it’s like a festival of neuroses when I go to the gym…(okay, I’m exaggerating, it’s not a festival, more like a small gathering of your closest – b*tshit insane – friends). At some times, it’s so absurd that I just giggle to myself and move on. Other times I am really convinced that everyone is staring at my unshaven legs. (And don’t even get me started on the horror that is in my head if I’ve forgotten to shave my armpits – CAPTAIN CCCCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAVVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMANNNNNNNNNNNN – well, Captain Cavewoman).


You get my point.

The funny thing is, G doesn’t appear to worry about any of this..and I know for a fact he has worn the same shirt 2 days in a row!

This got me thinking (yup, now come the musings). Is it just me who thinks like this? Is it all women? (Beyoncé probably does not worry about these things). If it’s all women, what do men worry about at the gym? Do men obsess about a spot they missed while shaving, being smelly?

So I’m putting this out there to all my male readers (That’s you, G! – kidding…I think). What are the little things (or big things) that you worry about at the gym? And for my girls, what crazy little thing have I left off my list above that you worry about at gym?

Com’on people, let me know that I’m not alone in Crazytown :).

 

 

4 Responses to “ What do men worry about at the gym? ”

  1. Chris says:

    Farts. I worry about passing gas during a wod. That’ll be the day I never come back… when I PR my flatulence.

  2. Jacki says:

    The missed spots on the legs get me all the time. Especially the knees. I can obsess on the long hairs on my knees (because that means I missed them several times) for hours.
    Then there is the fact that my nanos are black and red but all my workout tanks are purple or hot pink.
    And if you can see my muffin top under my tank.

    • Rae says:

      I hear ya! What is it about knees that it is so hard to remember them when shaving?!? And the muffin top, don’t even get me started…and my pants are always sliding down…..

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